"Mom, Jimmy has a video game where you can steal a truck and run over prostitutes with said truck and steal their money and use the money to buy grenades and throw said grenades at police officers and use a dildo to beat their charred corpses for hours while yelling the n-word.  Can I get it for my birthday?"

Have your child find a field of crops with a combine harvester.  Encourage him or her to assume the role of a farmer, and do everything a farmer does!  He or she is to drive the harvester over the crops from dawn until dusk.  Unfortunately, the game does not allow Carl to eat, drink, sleep, or take showers.  When nightfall comes, lecture your child on the virtues of a healthy imagination, then have him or her walk to the front door of the house and remain there for twelve hours until it is one again daybreak.  For the most realistic simulation possible, do not permit your child to take his or her eyes off the screen or put down the controller.

For minimal eyestrain, encourage your child to play the game during its daylight hours.